After conservative commentator Ben Shapiro tweeted that his “doctor wife” had diagnosed a WAP as a dangerous medical condition, it occurred to me that it might be fun to speak to an actual medical expert in WAPs, both to weigh in on the truly idiotic discourse and to get her unique take on the song’s important message (that WAPS are great). This weekend, as I listened to “WAP” 400 times and evangelized about it to anyone who would listen, including those in my immediate biological family, I also watched it become a vessel for the banal, performative rage of sad and horny Republicans. Sonically, it is the very embodiment of filthy, delirious joy, a paean to loving your vagina so much that you must dance about it with friends and tigers in a shallow indoor pool. Lyrically, it is Shakespeare by way of Pornhub - an evocative, comedic tour de force, an enviable mastery of both tone and form. I am not afraid to declare that this song is freaking perfect. You know the part in Pulp Fiction where Uma Thurman nearly dies but then John Travolta gives her a shot of adrenaline to the heart and she wakes up gasping and screaming? This barely approximates my reaction to “WAP,” the new song from Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion, which dropped on Friday and woke me from months of pandemic-induced depressive pseudo-slumber. NPR insists that it is better to read the lyrics than to listen to them since the wording and “politics of pleasure” are what make the song great.“Men are constantly bragging about how hard their dicks are and how long they are, but women don’t get to brag about how wet they are.” (Remember, some Americans still get their news from NPR.) It appears John Lennon’s “Imagine” is in danger of falling to second all-time, as a result. When driving home from work, radio listeners are searching for a “filthy bit of joy” on the radio. “Such a filthy bit of joy may be born of entertainment, but it persists as necessity - fake prudishness be damned.” “At its core, ‘WAP’ is Cardi and Meg’s assertion that their expression, both artistic and sexual, belongs to them and them alone.” Remember that if you are an artist hoping to make the list in 2021. The blurb goes on: “The backlash, however inseparable from the song’s cultural narrative, only bolsters the argument for its politics of pleasure.” Maybe NPR doesn’t even like those musical features. After all, that is what makes good music, according to NPR.Īs for the beat and rhythm? Who cares. A song is the best as long as the right unnamed “zealots” are bothered by it. The beat and quality of a song are irrelevant. Wait, I thought this is a music list? Wrong. “To no one’s surprise, a pair of women honoring their own ladyparts and the pleasures they dish out and expect returned in spades drew the ire of the insecure, of zealots and moral grandstanders,” NPR explained. Not even close.Īccording to their pandering blurb, “WAP” was the best because it supposedly “drew the ire” of the Americans whom NPR despises. But that’s not why NPR ranked it as such. It’s catchy and great for those, such as Democratic politicians, who are allowed to party with friends. NPR determined that the best song of 2020 is Cardi B’s “WAP” (“Wet-ass Pussy”), which came in No. NPR, subsidized by taxpayers, is no different. Instead, rankings now depend on how woke the film is, how critical of America the novel is, how bent-Left the historical book reads, and how much a TV show that has nothing to do with race is about race. Outlets no longer judge content on quality. Every December, I used to search for lists ranking the best movies, shows, songs, and books of the year. Creating year-end lists was once a great content idea.
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